People tell me I'm insecure for no reason. I am insecure. But from what I can tell at the moment, this is with pretty good reason. I've been single now for 5 years. In that time, I've had a few guys show interest and then just stop. Nothing. Either that or I get srung along with the old "I really like you, but I've just come out of a relationship and I'm not ready" line. That's why, when I met a lovely sailing gentleman last weekend, I told myslef that I wouldn't get my hopes up. Yet here I am waiting for the promised phone call, checking my phone every two minutes and refusing to send another message lest I seem like a crazy stalker type person, the kind of girl I never wanted to be. The kind of girl who texts incessantly and demands answers- that's just not fair to anyone! But at the same time, I want the damn answers! I want the reasons why I get to a certain stage and then get ignored. I'm not a particularly crazy, obsessive, extreme girl and do have some good personality traits (despite the odd hanger obsession).
What annoys me the most is that at this moment, I'm getting myself in a complete state over someone who I knew for less than 48 hours and they have managed to gain this ridiculous hold on me that has, I admit, crushed me a little bit. The bit of confidence I initially gained from the encounter has been destoyed tenfold. It's no wonder then, that I am no longer the same outgoing, confident girl that I have been. The one who isn't afraid to put herself out there.
This is not meant to be a self pitying post, or a plea for attention. Nor is it an attack on men. It is merely a way to express a little frustration!
Xx
We've totally all been there lovely and it sucks! Went out with someone a few times fairly recently, was all going fine from my perspective, then he told me he was also seeing someone else and didn't really want to stop seeing either of us. I made that decision pretty easily for him, let me tell you! You just have to laugh sometimes. xxx
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